Archive for the ‘wierd events’ Category

The Pigeon Lady

So yesterday at 11:00 a.m. I made my way over to the banquet hall in East Peoria to play background music for a few hours for a Christmas party put on by Coldwell Banker Devonshire. I knew the general location but met with a few snags on the way. Following is a list of the worst luck a person can experience in a day.

  • My windshield wiper, damaged in the great snowstorm of 2006, flew off when I attempted to clear my windshield of the huge amounts of dirty water spray it was being assaulted with. (It hit the car behind me. Oops.)
  • The truck in front of me missed the memo of the flying windshield wiper and continued to assault my windshield with copious amounts of dirty water – despite attempts made by me to try to go around him. He had a vendetta.
  • Due to the lack of windshield wiper (yes it was passenger side, but have you ever tried to use your driver’s side windshield wiper and heard the SCREEEEEECH that the other one makes? It’s horrid. Fingernails on chalkboards? Music to my ears after that) I could not see out of my window very well so I rolled down my side window and mimic’d a dog – all I was lacking was the lolling tongue.
  • I got lost. Of course I got lost – I’m Lydia the Lost. Lydia the Direction Misinformed. Lydia the Wandering.. you get the point.
  • While lost I ended up under a bypass and under said bypass was a flock of pigeons. One saw my open window and made a dash for it, flew in front of my face and flapped around in my backseat until I managed to get my windows all down and shoo it out.

I made it to the party without further incident – it went very well, I was well compensated.. but seriously, what kind of individual has a day like that.

I should have just gone nuts and had pigeon stew for dinner last night. It would have served the darn pigeon right.


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